Saturday, 25 February 2012

As the man, do you wait? As the woman, do you settle?

'You're beautiful.' he said with all the certainty he could muster. 

But instead of embarrassingly looking away or dismissing his claims out of flattery, she held his gaze and gave the most sorrowful smile he'd ever seen. As if to say, 'I know...But what does that mean in the scheme of things?'

And it was that sadness in her eyes that made him want to do the irrational.

He was willing to love her.

- - -

He was willing to love the female that he watched run at the slightest hint of commitment. He was willing to love the girl who ran from responsibility and chose freedom, even at the expense of owning the world's most beautiful material things.

He was willing to love the girl who he came to understand as the embodiment of unpredictability and mystery. How many times had he sat across from her in the tiny cafe sharing a cup of coffee and watched her leave without so much as a logical explanation?

How many times had he seen her small lips twitched into the sweetest and child-like smile and the next minute, reversed into a heart-shattering frown as her eyes flashed with a hurtful memory? His own heart had clenched everytime he saw her eyes lose its light and lustre, and it unconsciously made him angry at the memories that summoned such a painful sight on her face.

He was determined to love her. Love her until joy seeped into her eyes. Love her until her crisp, genuine laughter filtered through the air everywhere she went. 

He was willing to be her anchor. He was willing to anchor her.

He was willing to offer her his name, everything in his name, his protection, care and adoration. He  was willing to offer her the world.

He was going to give her whatever it was neccessary to make her stay. To make her stay with him.

- - -

But she's flighty. Whimsical. Fickle.
You can see it in her eyes that she's restless. All she wants to do is be free.
Physically. Artistically. Intellectually.

Her friends say she's like a bird. 

And a caged bird doesn't sing.

- - -

As the man, do you wait for her? Do you wait for someone who does not know when they will return, when they will want to settle down and when they will want to open their heart to you?

Do you wait for someone who will probably never want to come back, never want to settle down or never want to open their heart to you?

But you cannot deny being enthralled by her. Every moment with her is sensory overload and it is so easy to become intoxicated by her. Your senses have unconsciously memorised every essential inch of her: her face, her body, hair, long pointy fingers, elegant ankles, sweet smell, feminine mannerisms...

Everything that makes her a woman suffocates you into wanting nothing but her.

- - -

And as the woman, do you settle with him? Do you drop everything to be with a man who loves you this much? This is a man who is willing to give you his all. This is a good man who is willing to love you for all your ludicrous flaws. Where are you going to find a gentleman like this again?

He could give you the world and his only condition is that you stay by his side.
But you are a woman scorned from past experiences. You constantly live in the darkness. You mourn lost opportunities, you cry for past failures and carry the scars of rejection everywhere you go. 
Life has become a mighty effort. And for what reason? Because you chose and continue to choose to pursue your dreams. 

Your dreams. I'm talking about the dreams that you have dreamt for half your life. Dreams that cannot seem to come true no matter what you do. But nonetheless, dreams that are so attractive that regardless of how many failures, you find yourself manically chasing after them.
It is this undying spirit that you, as this woman, instinctively know helped piqued the man's interest in you. It is your stubbornness to take the artistic and flighty route that has made you different and attractive. 

But surely, a flighty nature and creative tendencies cannot hold the attention of a man for life. At some point in time, he will abandon you because you are too flighty and vague. He will become frustrated with your inability to decide, commit and see through things.
At that point, this man might abandon you. 
And as this woman, you fear abandonment more than not being able to fulfill your dream.

- - -

As the man, do you wait?

- - -

As the woman, do you settle?

Friday, 17 February 2012

Weekly Musings .

The images used in this blog post were collated over an extensive period of time. The ones that have not been watermarked by myself, have been saved from a variety of sources. If any of the images belong to you and you would like me to credit you or remove it, please feel free to email me -

I know lip palettes aren't as pretty looking as a normal lipstick but I still love and favour them! 

I honestly think that all cosmetic brands should mass produce lip palettes and make them more readily available. I mean, the most likely place you'll see lip palettes for sale are at duty-free and I'm always in too much of a rush to browse and buy. 

I absolutely don't own enough lipsticks to make my own lip palette but I love this video. So ingenious!

Such profound insights into our 21st Century lives.

But what can be done?

Modern forms of employment often involve long hours, stressful encounters and adrenaline-filled experiences. It should be no surprise that our health suffers. And yet, if we don't work, we don't eat and by extension, lose our health as well.

I don't know how to rectify this.

I, too, want to live in the moment and get caught up in 'the now'. I really want to.

But I fear for the future. If I were to recklessly live in the now, how will my future be affected?

Once, a gentleman sang to me and I didn't like it. 

Maybe it was because I didn't like him. Maybe it's the fact that he cockily said, 'I have a great voice' when he really didn't. Maybe it's the fact that I've spent the large majority of my life singing/attempting to sing and therefore would know the difference between a good and bad voice. 

It's subjective, I know. But it's difficult to think of a person who regularly sings off-key as a good singer.

Don't sing to me, unless you can sing on key. 

Apparently being beautiful and being intelligent are polar-opposites. If you're beautiful, you cannot possibly be intelligent and if you're intelligent, you're unbelievably hideous. 

'If you want to be taken seriously, you have to be. . .less pretty.' I will never forget the day I heard these words.

Wear minimal make up, display your physical imperfections to demonstrate that you take yourself too seriously to care about the shadows underneath you eyes, wear your hair in a ponytail and give up your hair straightener. Wear a conservative outfit that makes you look like you mean business. Look intimidating. Look intellectually intimidating.

Yes, because a flawlessly made up face, runway-ready hair and a fashionable outfit means that you're only operating with a quarter of your brain.

Is this the only way you'll take me seriously? Shall I cut my hair, wear less make up and dress even more conservatively so that you can look at me and firmly believe that I can get the job done?

But what if I want to be taken seriously and be beautiful at the same time? What if I want to be a vain intellectual? Is that okay with you? 

What's so intimidating about a beautiful and intelligent professional that you have to go around saying that women cannot be both? 

I want you to only think of me on two occassions. . .and that's day and night. 

Do you think you can do that?

It's actually my birthday in a few days and I've got my eyes on this YSL Flirty Bowler Bag in Red Leather. It is gorgeous! 

It's part of the Cruise 2012 line and it took my forever to find out the name after seeing it in a Chinese magazine!

And I'm loving the look of Tiffany and Co's 'Heart Lock Diary'

I'm in need of a new journal and I've been searching high and low for a pretty diary with acid-free /archival paper. Not sure if the Tiffany diary has acid-free paper but I wouldn't mind getting my hands on one of these. 

Super gorgeous, is it not? Which colour should I get?!

Do not be afraid to be the main focus of attention. Do not be afraid of what only a few of us can actually achieve.

Saturday, 11 February 2012

Review : Clinique's Derma White City Block Anti-Pollution SPF 40/PA +++

I am sunscreen-adverse. I absolutely hate wearing sunscreen. I've been trying a fair few sunscreens lately and they either sting, give me an ghostly gray-cast or makes my skin excessively oily after 2-3 hours. I just really, really, really don't like sunscreen!

But, alas, sunscreen is a neccessary evil. Although I hate wearing it, I am constantly on the hunt for something that works. Blame it on the fact that after spending my undergrad years lounging in the sun without protection, I've started to sprout freckles.

Admittedly, they're not overly visible but if I don't start wearing sunscreen, I'm paranoid that they'll just get darker. 

My mother has been using Clinique's Derma White City Block Anti-Pollution SPF 40/PA +++ for awhile now and has been telling me to give it a go. So this time when I went over to Hong Kong, I picked up my very own. The tinted sunscreen is an Asian-region exclusive and works to protect your skin from the sun and whiten at the same time. 

The fact that it is a tinted sunscreen means that I didn't have to worry about looking gray in the face. But I did worry about the beige-y tint not suiting my skintone since I am on the paler side.

Luckily, when the tint is blended into my skin, the colour dissolves and becomes quite sheer. It really looks like I'm not wearing anything underneath. If anything, the sunscreen immediately brightens my face and gives it a nice, healthy glow. It also works quite well as a base for make up days as my foundation and blush seems to 'stick' better and last longer.

However, after 2-3 hours, my face starts getting oily. What a let down! The pores on my cheeks look impossibly enlarged and my forehead is oily enough to fry an egg. 

Let down. 

Unfortunately, I can't comment on whether the sunscreen whitens in the long term because I haven't used it many times. I have asked my mother about it and she hasn't seemed to notice any whitening effects. Hmm.

Just in case anyone wanted comparisons between this whitening sunscreen and Clinique's Super City Block 40 SPF, I can say that I honestly prefer the former. 

Super City Block is ultimately lighter in colour but when blended out, it gives my skin a gray overcast which cannot be covered or rectified with foundation. It also makes my skin oily from the very beginning. Definitely a product that I wouldn't recommend to anyone. 

Oh well, back to the drawing board!

Thursday, 2 February 2012

Shoes, Glorious Shoes!

Have you ever bought two pairs of shoes in the same style? I have - countless times! Blame it on the fact that I have size 8.5-9 feet and believe in that elusive idea of wearing comfortable shoes. Once I find something that I like and is comfortable, I buy as much as I can.

So when I tried on these two booties at the Le Saunda Outlet in Hong Kong and found them super duper comfortable, I bought them in black leather and off-pink suede. I love booties, as opposed to knee high boots because the latter makes my hips and thighs bigger than they really are. I also love how fierce some booties can look. They can really give an outfit that extra edge!

These booties are unbelievably comfortable and that's mostly because they're platformed. Love platformed shoes! Gah, can't wait until winter rolls around so I can wear them!

And even better - they were half price! Two for the price of one! Woo!

And Zara shoes! Half price as well! I adore pointed shoes. They're just so feminine and classy, don't you think? The heel is a good height too and I found myself picking them up in this colour and black as well. They're good for a day of shopping or a day at work.

Love versatility.

Speaking of shoes being on sale, Nine West is having a really good sale on at the moment. Things are half price, if not more. I'm in love with these shoes and I'll be going to check them out on the weekend. Await my good news!

Then there's this pair. Goodness me. Burberry's Raffia Platform Sandal. Sigh. I want, I want, I want! I want so bad! They just look so super classy. . .difficult to walk in. AHAH. At $895, I probably have to sell myself to get my hands on a pair of these! AHAH.

Anyone willing to buy me?! AHAH.